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A THIN LINE OF THREAD
by: Candice Feldstein [candice@feldstein.net]
How long does a thread last? I know as one with bipolar disorder. When I’m functioning
with no symptoms, I have normal thought processes and movements with
nothing lurking inside my head except a tremor.
When symptoms develop my intellect and drive start exploding.
Can I extend the thread and capture these moments?
I can, then enjoy it, and pay the consequences sometimes all at
once. Having a flurry of
ideas walking tall, and sleeping gently after medication is no disguise
for the thinness of the thread. Staying
in one place when your system slows down strengthens the thread. The
thin line
Stiffens.
A PIECE OF THREAD
The way to write with bipolar disorder is a
challenge. The thought is
there struggling to come out. Words
splash on the page like a pointillist’s canvas.
Every letter dictating a thought.
Every word building a sentence.
Every sentence telling a story.
Can one put in words the meaning of mania,
depression? A struggle to
get free of either? Try to
catch a burst of enthusiasm, a rising thought, and a slide back to
normalcy. It’s not easy
but the painted picture is already there.
Grab the canvas and shake the points off.
It drips into a surrealist’s world capturing time, status and
place. You’re on top of
yourself and it feels good. Keep
your thoughts coming while you savor the points.
There is more reward in telling one’s story than in
relinquishing itself into mindless scatter.
The reward is endless like the mind’s potential.
Tell your mind’s story as a piece of thread and there is no
need to ignore your body. They’ll
both tie together.
THE SPOOL OF LIFE
You have a story written.
Can it occupy your mind and your life?
Think back and capture your life points.
Every turn of the spool circles your experiences,
hopes, and dreams. Not
always in place the thread is still there on the spool.
It tells of the twists and turns, the ups and downs, the
successes, and the failures. The
thread can be put back straight on the spool like our life experiences. It takes a long time to get to the end of a spool of thread.
Most people never do. Bipolar
people need to have a new spool so the thread is always there.
A slim price to pay for the spool of life.
KNOT THE THREAD
Is knotting the thread difficult in the spool of
life? It always is. Your mind can tie it for you. A strong thread can tie the
knot of a panicked life. One is nervous, then paranoid, and against the
wind. Always
Alert but never there.. One is held secure between
two differing blows at the same time. Break out
And tie the mind’s knot. You’ll be secure in
the way you tied it all together. Life’s travails are the knot
But the leftover string is your thin line of
thread.
THE YARN OF THE STORY
Have you had your thought jangle today?
A thought jangle is a positive or negative interruption
In your thought process or sleeping state by
another living being or yourself. Everybody
has both.
People with bipolar disorder have more negative
interruptions than most-especially with themselves.
A garbled thought is better than no thought at all.
It spins its way and goes only where it knows how
Into something positive or negative. We can all
enjoy the positives but the negative is the yarn of the
Story. Let it lie and it will pass onto oblivion
like a ball of unused yarn that can make a quilt to patch
Your mind. A thin line of thread strengthens the
patches. A mix of yarn and thread makes a good yarn
Of a jangled story.
TIE THE LOOP
Facing your challenges and succeeding closes the
loop on your last stitch. I finished stitching, therefore I succeeded.
When you accomplish and succeed an emptiness lifts. You loop is your way
to exercise a rising thought, a creative chase, or a new endeavor. It
tightens and a new approach to success will start.
BREAKING THE THREAD
From one piece of thread to the next is a narrow
opening of life. Grab the spool and extend the line of thread until your
thoughts take hold and you start once again to piece together that thin
line which makes up the thread. The illness leaves a line that can be
transformed to a start into a mental security.
Breaking the thread completes your move and extends life’s safe
feelings.
SPOOLS OF THREAD
Blue (sky) A clear sky on a spring day brings a
soothing light feeling to a closed mind.
Red (sensual) A rapturous climb to a bodily high
makes one stay with one’s mind.
Yellow (passive disregard) A stray in the way of a
lucid thought and a mood of temptation overwrought.
Green (an evening’s walk) A relaxing stroll
through a park and a strengthening of a tattered soul.
Pink ( a soothing kiss) A glide with a person in a
rose petal while in a feathery velvet daze.
Purple (a neutral thought) A moment to rest your
mind and leave aside any moments that arise.
Orange (a great time)A movie, party, or friend and
a big rhyme for an empty time.
White (a clear mind) A restful transparency and an
ease of thought.
THE WHOLE YARN
What gives a beautiful peak into a piece of thread
Is a standing spool to wind your head
Colors galore take a spin
To tell a tale of all within
In a row a luminous rainbow
Keeps one mentally sound in crackle
Always begin to catch a wind
Of sound not heard when you begin
Medicine will reign on all that falls
Listen to your head that only crawls
Soon the thread’s turn will be met
And a peaceful ride will ensue one’s head
A piece of thread can make a whole yarn.
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