We Ain’t Wrong, We Ain’t Sorry, and It’s Probably Gonna’ to Happen Again!
I love this line from the great Country song, ‘The Truth About Men’, by Tracy Byrd. In fact I love the whole song because it reminds me of so many things about not just being a man at times, but also the other times that this phrase is so appropriate to a my bipolar existence!
Let me run through some examples of my life where I have known absolutely, categorically, and finally that I was right. Therefore any notion of saying sorry was completely off the radar screen. Of course, if you are right, you are right! So why should you not be asserting your rightness will occur again?
If I tell you that the majority of the times that this absolute certainty has occurred have been during my manic or hypo-manic phases – I suspect that you might have an idea of the real situation.
Okay – one situation was not long after a new security guard started at the site where I was working and it was my job to make sure that she knew the Operating Procedures and site layout and what was expected of her. Now I admit that when I am teaching or instructing it does tend to bring out the hypo in me, and that is why I enjoy it so much. However, I soon found that I seemed to be having difficulty in getting some of the basic procedures over as every single thing was questioned and argued why?
I tried the, explain everything slowly again, method without success. I then tried the usual answer that often solved too many queries, ‘Well, that is what the client wants, so we have to do it that way.’
Well; when even that didn’t work out came my – “You will do exactly as you are told to do in these procedures, I don’t care if you agree or not, there are safety reasons for following them the way we do and you are required to follow them to the letter. Are you going to do that?” type of speech complete with appropriate (I thought) stern voice and solemn demeanour.
When the answer received was she would think about it – my response was immediate and strong. I was right and she was wrong in not following my rightful directions – so I wrote her up on report for failing to obey a site safety direction and a lawful order.
After the hullabaloo died down some weeks later, following the lodgment of harassment claims and all that sort of thing. I followed orders and apologized for making the guard feel harassed. I was right (although I apologized for the upset that had been felt), typical numbskull guard I was thinking!
The other example happened not long after I was married. My wife and I were going out to a Chinese restaurant with a friend and his wife and then on to one of the local clubs.
I parked the car and led everyone up to the restaurant front door – looked in and could see that there were tables for us okay and went to pull on the door to open it. The door wouldn’t budge, so I pulled harder and harder, and then rattled it a bit. By which time the staff and patrons inside were watching what was going on.
My friend said to let him have a go. And so I did and he had the same result, pull, push, rattle and still no open.
Then my wife sweetly smiled and said would we boys like the girls to try? Naturally two mere males were not worried about this attempt by our weaker wives were we?
To our great embarrassment, my wife using just two fingers on the door handle slid the door sideways to open it. There was a small round of spontaneous applause from inside as we sheepishly followed our wives inside. Now that meal was probably the quickest meal I have ever eaten at a Chinese restaurant I was so embarrassed. When my wife said – ‘Didn’t you see the – Slide Door Please – sign by the handle?’ The only thing I could stammer out was that I quickly read it as Side Door Please.
Now you think that proving I was right once in the night would be enough wouldn’t you?
Well you would be wrong. Because on the way out of the same door as we finished - guess who tried to pull or push the door open? That’s right – you guessed it – little old always right me!
So the next time you are in a hypo mood and feeling always right, next to the intellectual pygmies that surround you – remember; one day a giant, the next a pygmy?
1 May 2006
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