I'm 25 years old and have been going through 12 years of unlucky,unqualified phychiatric help.As i'm getting older I find it almost near impossible to wake up to another day of struggle.I start with a doctor and it's good for the first few weeks to a month I feel like this is the one doctor that is going to help me and then it all happens the doctor does or says something that I may disagree with or he gives me a medication{mainly antipsychotics} that i have horrible side effects and i loose faith and hope and I stop going.I've gotten to almost the end I'm having trouble just breathing I moved to a different state to get away thinking somewhere new will help and then that it's worst. I have so much trouble working. There's periods of times where I can't remember what's going on in my life. I recently moved a few months again to another state because I couldn't handle anything anymore and left my 6 yr old child with my family thinking they will all be better off without me and now in a new state and horribly guilty about leaving my baby and family and with everything else under my belt I don't know where to turn I've been diagnosed with bordrline,bipolar,anxiety,ocd,bdd and have very little or no trust with doctors exspecially state help. I have no money and no where to go and I really think at the brink of insanity I don't know how live anymore.I had so many questions and now I don't know what they where and am quiet sure you will not see this. I guess I'm just rambling on out of fustration.