Q:  My Attacks Have Become Greater

I NEED HELP... unfortunitly i have a rare case of bipolor where my attacks happen ever hour instead of a usual monthy cycle... my attacks have become greater and suicide seems like the only way out... ive been on med. and i've seen many psychologist and i know a great deal of my disease... i actually consul many people but no one has been succesfull with me... pardon my spelling im writting really fast because i need to be off... but heres the thing... i am a writer and ive turned this curse into a gift yet im losing every day and i dont know what i have left to do... suicide seems like the only way for me expecially since i lost the only two people in my life to truely love me in the same summer... i am alone and i cant sleep... meds wouldnt work on me and i've tried so many... all i can do is write to calm me for the moment... i just need some advice on what i should do... i just want this to stop killing me inside and finally i can smile... the doctors i have seen havnt been able to explain whats the reason my attacks flare like they do and they've become useless because i understand it more than they could... i dont want to leave but i dont have much else to do... i just want the gift but not have it kill me...

what should i do?   i need help
akin


Dear Akin -- 
Antidepressants and alcohol and too much late-night light (maybe) can cause this kind of ultra-rapid cycling.  So, first thing to do is consider trying to turn them down or off, under your doctors' supervision.  Have you seen the stuff about treating rapid cycling by re-sensitizing your hypothalamus?  Or the general information on complex non-"manic" bipolar disorder?  I'll bet you've not had thyroid hormone or combinations of mood stabilizers without antidepressants?  

Dr. Phelps

Published November, 2001